Ahmad Dialdin

Guys, I have been a parent for a whole four months, so basically an expert. Allow me to impart a few bountiful fruits of my experience that I personally wasn’t aware of or prepared for. Older dads, feel free to laugh at my innocence. Newer ones, bow before me.

1. Milky goodness. 

Did you know that breast milk has endocannabinoids, a component similar to that which is found in certain drugs? It’s critical for stimulating the suckling process as well triggering hunger in the baby, giving him the “munchies” so that he gets his fill of milk and nutrition. Totally explains my kid’s glazed-over look after feeding!

2. Be heart-centered. 

You will doubt yourself constantly. People will doubt you constantly. They’ll do so trying to help, but you’re going to end up feeling lost and incompetent. Please, just do things out of love, follow your heart and you will be fine. If you see your little one and they feel loved and cherished, you’re parenting perfectly.

3. You know what’s best.

You will read and hear about the generalities, but remember that your baby is an individual who will feel, act and react to things in his own way and no one rule or time-frame will apply. All that parenting advice you suddenly get from every single person on the planet? Take what you like but shrug the rest off. You know what’s best for your own child.Labor and birth is the same thing. To get a sense of that, I highly recommend reading “Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth” and the ridiculously diverse birth stories in it (yes, I’m still talking to the dads).

4. Exhaustion.

New parents are always jokingly asked about their sleep. I’ve learned that you get used to the physical exhaustion quickly because you have to. What I wasn’t prepared for was the emotional and mental exhaustion that stays with you. It’s that knowledge that you will forever worry about this human being and that they will be on your mind and in your heart every single second for the rest of your life.

5. Don’t watch the circumcision. 

This is a super specific scenario and, in hindsight, it should’ve been common sense, but I learned the hard way. I really should’ve just kept eye contact instead of looked at what the doctors were doing. (Shudder) It’s traumatizing seeing what happens.

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I’m Online! Hi Online, I’m Dad. 

If you ask my wife, she’ll tell you that my life purpose has always been to be a dad. Not that I disagree with it, but it’s not something that ever occurred to me before. I’m 36, so coming in late to fatherhood, especially in our neck of the woods. Heck, I’m the last of my group of friends to join the club; notwithstanding our resident bachelor (every group has one).

You know what happens when you search Saudi dads on Google? Nothing happy. All I wanted was advice on where to go to buy stuff, doctors, schools, commiseration and so on. I crave that camaraderie and fellowship in a community of dads sharing their experiences, trials and adventures through fatherhood here.

Well, since I’ve got this outlet, I’m putting my stake in the ground. Dads of Sharqiya, dads of Saudi, let’s talk! I have no idea what this will look like, but I’m going to share what happens, the lessons I learn and hopefully even tips on how to maneuver fatherhood in Sharqiya.

Here’s my first piece of realization and it’s to the non-dads out there. There’s so little that we’re told about and no one can really prepare you for that sense of responsibility. Once that little one shows up, you will feel this overwhelming desire to escape because you realize that you can no longer ever escape again. You are inexorably and completely tied to this new being.

But, here’s the yang to that yin of a note: that first time he looks at your face, squints as if he’s processing something and then smiles and laughs in recognition of his dad; it’s a straight-up dose of euphoria right to your heart and you’ll realize that there’s nowhere else you will ever want to be. Unconditional love is the best drug.

By the way, best part about all of this? Dad jokes, man. Full unadulterated clearance to say the silliest, stupidest and most corny jokes and puns (let’s share plenty of those here as well). Ah, I’m home.

Hmm, maybe my wife was right after all.

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